I fear seducing women: How do I get them to approach me instead?

Help

  • I don’t like approaching women because I can’t stand the thought of being rejected
  • But I have a friend who always seems to have beautiful girl around him, ladies come to him
  • How do I get women to approach me instead?

I fear rejection, how can I make girls approach me

I am a good-looking guy in my mid-twenties and I am looking for a relationship. I don’t like approaching women because I can’t stand the thought of being rejected.

I have a friend who always seems to have beautiful girls around him and he never has to ask them out, they come to him. How do I get women to approach me instead of me approaching them? Tony, Meru

Dear Tony,

You want ladies to approach you? Dreams are made of this! Approaching a woman is terrifying but rejection is not the worst thing in the world.

Even if you succeed in getting women to approach you, it might not be the kind of women you want. The only way to get the woman you want is for you to seek her out and ask her out.

New boyfriend is too busy for my phone calls

Hi, I started dating a wonderful guy two months ago and I am totally in love with him. He is sweet, caring and generous and he makes me feel good about myself.

 Unfortunately, unlike my ex, this man is never available. Most of the time he doesn’t pick up calls and when he does he always seems preoccupied and cuts the conversation short. I am at a crossroad. Grace, Nairobi

Dear Grace,

Men are different and maybe your current boyfriend is busy and prefers face-to-face interactions with you.

Instead of calling him, let him be the one to call you when he is not busy and can focus all his attention on you.

We spend very little time with my man, it worries me

I have been in a relationship for four months and I love my boyfriend and really enjoy the time I spend with him.

 I feel bad when we have to part ways after a great time together. I’m starting to feel like he doesn’t want to spend time with me as I do.

I see him two to three times a week and when I suggest meeting more than that he says he needs his time alone. What do I do to make him want to spend more time with me? Ann, Lamu

Dear Ann,

Oh come on, you sound like one of those ‘nagging women’. It sounds like your whole life revolves around your boyfriend and you feel like your life outside your boyfriend is not interesting.

You should have an exciting life outside of your relationship so that you won’t be needy for his attention.

I drank too much on the first date and misbehaved help!

My crush asked me out last weekend and we went out for dinner and drinks. During the date, I ended up drinking too much and making a total fool of myself and now he has the wrong idea about me and isn’t replying to my texts anymore.

I feel horrible about it because I really like him and think he could be the one and I acted stupid and blew it. How do I get him to give me another chance? Stella, Bungoma

Dear Stella

My friend, pombe sio supu! I don’t know what you have been saying on those texts. Have you apologised for your drunken behaviour?

Try calling him to apologise or do it face to face. If he still isn’t interested, let it go. Another guy will come along. Men are like matatus, you miss one, you get the next.

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